Shoes of the Gospel

Dear Freinds (am I starting to sound like Mr. Rogers?)

Thank you guys who emailed me in response to my "teenage anguish". I really appreciate the support. I think it helped. :) I was able to do something for my college advisor which I had been wrestling with myself to do all Christmas break. (It's an essay about what I like, what I find enjoyable etc....If anybody would like to read it and comment....I've posted it below :)) So...yeah...I do want to go to college....even though I have no idea what I want to do with my life and what exactly I would like to study.
I think I know what's been bothering me though. (really bothering me....bothering isn't really the right word...it's more of a frustration....yeah....frustrating me...) (I would delete the bothering thing...but I'm going for a more Kerouacian style) It all dawned on me as I was rolling (rather slowly...cuz my friggen chair....ugg...don't even get me started) and I was goin' along, right...and these two girls are talking....so just to be polite (hehehe) I turn down my music....and I overhear part of their conversation:
"Like omg...weren't so and so's shoes soooo cute!"
And there it was like a bright and twinkling star, like a frikken plank in my eye....right in front of my eyes and ears...I understood. I've been so frustrated because people at my school are superficial cuttouts from a fashion magazine. There aren't....well a few...like two...but I don't hang with them enough....many people like me....at my school...that like the stuff I like...that yearn to go to cons and are christian ( there are people who are...I just don't talk with them much). This is what's been frustrating. So i'm not sure how to fix this frustration..I just feel alot better...cuz now I know what's been bothering me (perhaps its also my new interest in country music....I think I'm turning into a hick....oyvey as Cliffy would say) So if you could pray for me...and if you have any suggestions..email me....call me....how's that U2 song go...I only know the Weird Al version....Floss Me...Bill Me!!!....man Kerouac must have been drunk when he made up his writing style)


Essay thingie:

Most people would say I am a strange person. So I don’t surround myself with most people. Most people, especially in high school, in my opinion are boring squares that don’t have fun. To me fun has a lot to do with being different, or knowing things about what most people would never know about. If people find what I think to be interesting to be boring, then that’s their loss. I’ll keep on enjoying what I like to do.
For fun, one of the most important activities I participate in is writing. Whether this is writing short stories, poetry, or (I hope someday) novels, each time I put pen to paper I am able to scribe out my feelings and emotions. I’m not sure how my love for writing began, but for as long as I can remember I’ve wanted to do something to do with writing with my life. Perhaps because of my love of reading, I wanted to voice my own opinions and thoughts through my own stories, poems, and novels. Mostly writing in science fiction and fantasy, I enjoy these genres the most because I feel they give the writer the most freedom to use his imagination, and also explore the potential of mankind (even if I’m writing about aliens or ogres) (Even when your writing about fantastic creatures, your still only writing about human emotions under all the tentacles and horns). For a long time, I have tried to write poetry to express more down to earth emotions that I feel churning within myself. However, until recently, I was not able to express myself through this outlet. Since being able to rhyme and gain inspiration, I have written many poems, songs (at least attempts at songs), and also ballads. Poetry has become the most comfortable style of writing for me since then, but I really hope to develop this skill to a more complete fruitation during college.
Another activity in which I enjoy participating in is watch football. Specifically, I enjoy watching Green Bay Packer football. Even though some would argue this is a pretty passive pastime, I would have to disagree. I don’t remember how I became a Packer, but I know I will never root for another team in the NFL for as long as I live. I have visited Green Bay twice now, and have fallen in love with the town and team. Never before, nor anywhere else, will you see a town so completely absorbed in their team. A town with an approximate population of 90,000- 75,000 of them attends home games on Sundays. You cannot go two feet in the town without sighting a G logo on a door or car window. Even when they do terribly in their season, like this year for example (4-12), I will still loyally watch every game. I don’t give up, even when times get tough.
The final, and most important aspect of my life that I enjoy participating in is my faith. A fairly new believer in Christianity, I’m still learning a lot of what it means to be a Christian. (I’m told this doesn’t change much) Nothing is as comforting to me as the thought of a God who cares for me and loves me. My ever present inspiration for not only writing- but for life- God is the only one who keeps me going at certain points in my life. I also enjoy learning about my faith by studying the Bible. This is why I may want to go to a more Christian centered college so I will be able to take some theological classes or classes of that sort. I definitely want to go to a college where I will be able to practice my faith and where there will at least be others (any denomination) that celebrate the same God as I do.

Anyway

God Bless
Psalmer